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DON'T WAKE UP (Demo EP)

by crimesididntcommit

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all of the worst parts are true and i can hide them all from you truth erased and facts removed every answer always new all of my worst parts are true and i will hide them all from you details gone and truth erased emptiness left in their place hollowed out and hid inside they don't like what they find they don't like what they find the children are all under their beds alarms are going off but do not make a sound hands hold up their consequence inside the house nothing resides shadows of a half-lived life bend and move across the floor waiting in the corners as we drift off to sleep we can outrun anything anything except for ourselves they find our secrets in places we've never lived our hearts beat against the walls we hide them in all of my worst parts are true and i will hide them all from you i don't want forgiveness for all my mistakes i just want acceptance of all i can't face maybe there's a time and maybe there's a place where i am not right now i am not right, now they say it all tastes the same moment to moment and seconds to sand sometimes it gets that i can barely stand i can barely stand myself sometimes all of my worst parts are true and i can give them all to you
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can you tell me where it hurts this time? well, i think up everywhere inside can you tell me what you want tonight? well, i think i want this part of me to die how can anybody fall asleep when they're always so afraid? there's something i would keep if all of this was just remade i'm not the one who put you there but i'll cut you out of my veins pulling out more ropes to tie cords to hang from headaches pound and throb how can anybody fall asleep? every night i feel so robbed he is really her, i know i'm not really here, i know i am really her i know i'm not really here i know
4.
i want to fall through a crack in the sky i want to drown on the side of the road i don't want to be the one who's always in control responsible for all of the things you shouldn't be so hard on yourself accountable for everything don't be so hard on everyone else sleep just sleep i shut my eyes in the dark i feel you there at your mark everywhere predictable routine fear, ignorable i want to be someone who can take a breath i want to be someone with secrets to tell everything looks the same but you're not where you used to be everything looks the same why don't you just fall asleep?
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sutured the screaming mouths cut off the shaking hands i've got no hopes or dreams i've got no fucking plans, oh don't you hurt me don't you hurt me don't you hurt me now don't you hurt me? don't you hurt me? don't you hurt me now someone is at the phone we're never left alone suspended in black ink i'm lost in restless sleep don't you hurt me don't you hurt me don't you hurt me don't you hurt me? don't you hurt me now don't wake up don't wake up don't wake up don't wake up don't wake up don't wake don't wake don't wake up don't wake up don't you hurt me don't wake up don't you? hurt me don't wake up
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about

i couldn't sleep so i made this instead

you stand outside and watch lightning flash over the lake beyond the trees. none of it makes any sound, thunder absent, pieces missing that should form the whole. everything is off tonight. everything is out of place. the lawns sprawl out and fade into road and no wheels come rolling across them; no feet come pressing upon them. anything could be moving. anything could be near. edges and corners and trees and bushes and parked cars and forgotten houses block your view of something, but you don't know what. you always get the feeling that something is getting close to you, but it's never what you want to have near. go inside. lock all the doors. lay in the bed. lie in the bed. tell yourself things. blood flows and pumps. chemicals flood in the brain. legs kick, involuntary. pull the curtains over the windows and put sheets over the mirrors. nothing can see you in here, not even you. something is always about to happen, but then it never does. don't wake up

an ambient demo/experimental release.

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released September 30, 2018

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crimesididntcommit Florida

crimesididntcommit is the multimedia transgender electroheartache neon angst project of veronica emilyn. dealing with the horrific beauty of being in a body that knows it is alive, her music exists in spaces where dreams and nightmares collide, defying genres and blending confessional themes of mental illness, queer identity and longing into songs ghosts can dance to. ... more

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